There is a link to your mother deeper than you ever realized. And not only to her but her mother, your grandmother, and all the way down the family line. Memories are passed down in a chemical imprint on you before you're even born.
This imprint is a means of survival. You understand the world as they experienced it, so your genes are able to come into this world prepared. While your mother was developing in utero in your grandmother, the cells that form you were present, feeling everything your grandmother felt. After your mother was born you were there, experiencing life through her point of view. Her experiences coding every little bit into your future cells. Upon conception, your dad's lineage merged with your mom's lineage and knowledge from both sides of the family was downloaded into your genes.
You're born and whether you know your mother or not, you've picked up on some habits from her. You experience life with a predisposition to how she viewed the world. Your cells respond to certain things because of the life of your lineage. After working with thousands of people over the years, I've worked with some of these deep seated issues that have come up from mother. I've worked with people who were rejected by their mother, abandoned by their mother, criticized by their mother, felt like their mother was distant, didn't understand their mother, and so on. Their stories come from a deep place of hurt, understandably. You expect your mother to be someone who fully loves and accept you for exactly who you are. When you don't feel like she can do that for you, you feel a deep sense of insecurity - like something is wrong with you, like you're unwanted.
I've helped patients work through these issues by addressing the Ren meridian. This meridian is symbolic of the relationship between mother and child. It is a deeply nourishing channel all about the mothering connection. The primary branch of this channel runs from the perineum directly up the center of the body where mother carries baby, where baby is connected to mother through the umbilical cord, where mother holds her baby for skin to skin contact, where baby meets mother at the breast with the mouth.
This channel is all about self discovery, confidence, where do I belong in this world, responsibility, obligations, feeling nourished, and feeling at home. A healthy Ren shows up as strong boundaries, strong sense of love and self nourishment, not taking anything personally, feeling comfortable, confident, and giving. Abandonment issues are stored here and someone with an unhealthy Ren is excessively needy, lacks self-confidence, never gets enough love and attention, and takes things personally.
There are a lot of physical symptoms that can show up due to a disharmony in this meridian. Physical symptoms can include fertility challenges, menstrual imbalances, frequent miscarriage, vaginal discharge, abdominal pain and distention, trouble sleeping, shortness of breath, asthma, postpartum bonding issues, painful genitals, backache, weakness in abdominal muscles, problems with fluid regulation like cervical mucus or breast milk, and even digestive issues.
At the SAN Center, our whole team has a beautifully integrated support system to support you with the Ren meridian. Acupuncture, herbs, and flower essences work together to address the physical symptoms as well as the emotional root, however that shows up for you.
A Smoke Offering Ceremony is a blessing that can be done for you, or your relationship, and can remove obstacles that cause dysfunction and prevent healing. This can be done for you alone or both you and your mother can come in to help heal your relationship and your family line.
In Acupuncture we would pair lung 7 and kidney 6 points for balancing the Ren. You can use the Infinite Love Anointing Oil if you need some more self-love or, if you experienced any trauma from your childhood (whether it be abuse, the loss of your mother, etc), I suggest Boundless Wisdom.
Take these oils and rub them on these acupuncture points (inner right wrist + inner left ankle) 5 times per day and set an intention for healing, whatever that looks like for you. When you start caring for yourself + healing, this has a ripple effect on your entire family line - for those who came before you and those who come after you.
Hope to see you at the SAN Center this summer!